we began with a provisional scalpel
the changing of dressings
to prevent infection
oh my dear
how we have made an art
of cutting each other
i held your body
morphine limp
fitfully sedated and angry
as you grabbed the rails
kicked your feet
screamed obscenities
and tossed mortal sin cards
at the recovery room nurses
placed ice chips in your mouth
swabbed your tongue
as you called me selfish
and missed the emesis basin
vomit covering my hands
your carotids clear
and resuming breath
i remember the fear
the day you came home
saying the golden treasure physician
had predicted a leeching
i tried to wrap you in my affection
as you healed
a winter frock to warm you
sturdy enough
to endure
a lifetime together
white coat syndrome crept it
how ironically surprised i was
to feel
the instrument you used
to see the blood spray from my throat
was a seam ripper
we were destined to eviscerate each other
but make no mistake
i once loved you enough to sit in a waiting room
considering the diameter of your neck
and what it would take to save it
despite you being
a most horrid
undeserving patient