i need her to tell me

today i’m reaching out
for myself at age 55

older me who still wears her silver hair long

strong woman who survived
and came out swinging

i want to read her writing

i want to know how she kept from dying

i want to know when her anger went away

i want to meet her sons
who forgave her
for everything she couldn’t give them

i need her to tell me that love
saved all of our lives