this day and for the rest of time

you know

it is true what they say

 

your entire life really does

flash before your eyes

the moment before a motor vehicle accident

 

my film reel cigarette burned

car crash footage

went precisely like this:

 

i saw my twin sons locked out of the house

in 18 degree weather

upon returning from school

to find their mother nowhere around  & unalive

…this day and for the rest of time

 

i saw my mother’s face

and thought how i wanted

to touch her downy warm cheek

one more time

 

i thought about my brother bob

and how i would not live to see him  write

the great american novel

 

i saw the face of the man whom i am in love with

 

i thought about how happy i would be to see daddy

at the dinner table in heaven tonight

 

i saw my friends sarah, marissa, and sean

toasting to my existence

 

i thought about how grateful i am

to have been given this amazing life

 

thank you, god, whomever you are

alas

it is i who shall cover you

with a blanket of stars

this night