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local color love poetry mourning muse

will you still love me tomorrow

he loved me completely

he had the sweetest, big dumb bear grin

honey dripping even

when he looked at me

he smiled the length of the eastern seaboard

crooked loving sunshine in smiles over 5 o’clock stubble

whilst buying me tiny lobsters made of chocolate

took 1,001 pictures of me drinking coffee, eating lemon Italian ice

marveling at hermit crabs wearing ornately bejeweled shells

navigating social media oceans and long distance romances

from Neptune City to New York Harbor

we nearly sank together

we never truly said goodbye

we never stopped wanting

we never stopped feeling

but he never trusted himself

he never trusted me

though he had many names for me

baby gurl

angel kitten

alicia honey

sweetie poof,

and sometimes simply,

mine

he lied

and then abandoned me to coddle

his comfortable failures.

He once told me the opposite of love isn’t hate, it’s indifference.

How’s that working out, jack?

I knew he would never have the courage

to call me the one thing he should have called me:

his wife.

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