

so he took her like an animal
but my father’s ghost wept
so she went to the men
like a good American
good people don’t want to believe
in visionaries good or bad
especially when you have red clay mud
starved stabbed scabbed over and over
on your grandmother’s dress from being raped just like her
from ft. Sumter to Wounded Knee
he’d never seen that color red come out of a living fertility statue
my veil is torn
the dog is dead
the natives have resumed their drumbeat
it was a hot wednesday afternoon
i saw her downtown
this old high school classmate of mine
valedictorian of her class
hanging like a drying dish rag
on the pock-covered arm
of her fourth divorce
they looked like they had just driven in
from a northern shithole township
to taste
of the urban opioid market
oh,
merri smyth
merri smyth
full of
such
promise
please
tell me this
how is it
you are not
an astrophysicist
instead
a
mother of seven
living and dying
on public assistance
a woman’s life
is too tenuous
delicate
billowy
spider web
close call on I-75
in preterm labor
on the way to the
Paris airport
in the rain
fragile
beautiful
precious
sacrosanct
finite
for bad friends
bad family
bad coffee
bad shoes
bad mattresses
bad jobs
bad husbands
bad debt
and bad dick
learn this by 30 for maximum
enjoyment
future
female
conquerors
of a dying planet
you have descended
from indigenous medicine women
and girl scout goddesses
you came into this life
with power that takes growing
into
head held high
with strong female role models
confidence you will cultivate
by surviving pain
rising to challenges
you’re finding out
you’re stronger than you know
by
creating your own peace
owning your joy
making happiness your choice
remembering you have endured
their belittling words
because
they need to feel better than you
because they have nothing to be proud
how sad is that
pity them
waste no time on bitterness
take comfort
people like this are their own reward
you will rise above their words
you will outlive their petty hearts
the world fears all shades of women and girls
who believe in themselves
do not ever give a bad person
the power
to make you feel like
you are less
to make you ashamed of the way you are woven into the fabric of our universe
or that it is anything but
perfectly divine
to be you
he could not hide
his twisted psychology
behind his volunteering
his social networking
his name dropping
his poorly translated
banal Japanese poetry
his social work
and his damned bonsai trees
that he was a control freak
with a volatile temper
and a duplicitous nature
that he is the man in the bar rubbing his
chino covered cock on your thigh
condescending
manipulative
overly solicitous and hell bent
on getting his penis
into your vagina
anyone’s vagina
perceiving female poets
as emotionally compromised
easy targets
and if his unfortunate victim muse
was able to see his monstrous nature
through his kabuki mask
she was condemned by him publicly
as a crazy woman
of course
keep my mother proud of me
give my sons braggin’ rights
love in their hearts
and wisdom in their minds
be the reason my father’s sooty
fallen angel wings
spread wide
closer to the throne of god
when i do something right
perform a poem
at the inauguration
of the first female president
allow my deeds to accomodate
sleeping well at night
if she is fortunate
there comes a point
in the life of an evolving woman
when she learns to say
no
to herself and others
she recognizes the destructive patterns
and destructive people
she has repeated
she then begins to implement
a healthier method
of living
it is the moment she finds validation
inside her own skin
it is the moment
she ceases
to be dick dumb